Daily Devotional for Small Group Discussion: If We Take Sides

by Matt Laney | published on Oct 23, 2023

Discussion Questions

  1. The author quotes Thich Nhat Hahn: “Humans want to take sides. That is why the situation gets worse and worse.” When have you made a decision to take sides? What was useful—and what was limiting—about choosing a side? 
  1. Have you witnessed or read about effective conflict resolution that does not involve taking sides? 
  1. What stories of suffering, in both Israel and Gaza, are shaping your prayers for peace? 

How beautiful on the mountains are the feet of those who bring good news, who proclaim peace…” – Isaiah 52:7 

I write this shortly after Hamas launched their deadliest assault on Israel and the IDF responded with airstrikes; now thousands are dead on both sides. Over one hundred and fifty Israeli civilians, of all ages, are hostages. At least a thousand Palestinian children are dead. The suffering is unimaginable.  

I am an outsider to this conflict, but it seems to me that until shared suffering inspires an understanding of the other’s pain and trauma, instead of driving more violence toward each other, peace will seem like a pipe dream.  

Thich Nhat Hahn, who has stood between two warring factions, said, “To reconcile conflicting parties, we must have the ability to understand the suffering of both sides. If we take sides, it is impossible to do the work of reconciliation. And humans want to take sides. That is why the situation gets worse and worse.  

“Are there people who are still available to both sides? They need not do much. They need do only one thing: Go to one side and tell all about the suffering endured by the other side and go to the other side and tell all about the suffering endured by this side. This is our chance for peace.” 

In recent decades, small groups of Israelis and Palestinians found a way to peaceful reconciliation through shared tears. From what I understand, it takes a deep, resolute commitment to listening with compassion and without reacting. Multiplying such experiences might be the surest way to break the cycle of violence and build lasting peace in the region.   

And not only there. Until we all hear the suffering of “the other,” how can we hope to hear peace proclaimed from the Holy Land to our own backyards?

Prayer
Holy One, help me to listen more than I desire to be heard.

Matt LaneyAbout the Author
Matt Laney is the Senior Pastor of Virginia Highland Church UCC in Atlanta, GA and the author of Pride Wars, a fantasy series published by Houghton Mifflin Harcourt for Young Readers. The first two books, The Spinner Prince and The Four Guardians are available now.